At one point or another everyone has dealt with mixed signals, and even gave out a few mixed signals of their own. Dealing with mixed signals when really liking or enjoying someone’s company might be the most confusing situation, to the point you want to scream.
But what constitutes a mixed signal? What defines a mixed signal and what are some classic mixed signals everyone deals with? It is the cliché notion that men are notorious for giving mixed signals. But we are not bias here – both sexes send out mixed signals equally and both parties send out mixed signals maliciously.
A mixed signal by definition is an unclear message, two contradicting messages. Someone says one thing and does another – the polar opposite.
A report was done in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Martie G Haselton PHD and David M Buss PHD at the University of Taxes. They asked over 500 college students to picture themselves on a date. They used imagined acts to rate their companion’s and their own social interest and level of commitment. What was found was that men overestimated women’s sexual interest and woman underestimated men’s willingness to commit.
You would ask yourself why men and woman misjudge only certain cross-sex signals. It would be judged from the theory of natural selection; males way back in the day were more concerned and would loss out greatly if they missed a reproduction opportunity. So they did not really care if they had to face rejection. However, females after consenting sex whom were abandoned where left rejected and usually pregnant which taught woman that it was more costly for them to be deceived by men. So it would be safe to say that we are predetermined to assume that what the opposite sex is doing is a mixed signal and that some of our “natural” acts are just that, a natural reaction to evolution.
Some classic mixed signals –
They say “I am not ready for a relationship”
They do – Invite you to family gatherings, contact you every day, talk about future plans with you or that you are involved in
They Say “Yes we are together”
They do – Do not introduce you to their friends as their significant other. They do not introduce you to their family at all.
They Say “Can I have your number?”
They do – Never call!
They Say “can I take you out on a date again?” This would be the 10th date
They do – nothing – they never try to kiss you or make move
The main solution for mixed signals from anyone is fairly simple. Actions speak louder than words! What are their actions doing? Are their actions matching what they are telling you? People can talk until they are blue in the face however, if the actions do not back up what they are saying….believe the actions. Do not let yourself get blindsided by the words and talk – as it is very easy to do.
